Thursday, November 20, 2008

REVISED All-In: Hypo-Theticritical REVISED

"Cath, it seems that you live in someone else's dream
In a hand-me-down wedding dress
Where the things that could have been are oppressed
" Cath - Death Cab for Cutie

Imagine falling in love with someone to the point that your survival depends on their next breath. This person shares your type of humor, and your beliefs and political views could graciously hang out in the same room together. You love their tongue for providing eloquence in the words you hang onto, and how it sends messages through your skin that cause your eyes to roll back to places rarely seen. You would prefer death to their absence, and they reciprocate in ways you've never fathomed.

Now imagine that they're from another country and their Visa runs out next month and they HAVE to go back minus you. You've sifted through every option, but the only way you can stay together is by getting married. Sooo you do that and live happily ever after, end of story, UNLESS you both have the same epidermal architecture between your legs. Civil unions don't grant green cards.

"We have two kinds of morality side by side: one which we preach but do not practice and another which we practice but seldom preach." ~Bertrand Russell

If you voted to deny homosexual humans ANY of the same rights that you have, you have some s'plaining to do. Why do you get to impose your religious beliefs onto someone else? Beliefs that you, yourself don't 100% follow? Hip-hopcrisy? I'm tired of seeing rappers on tv saying that Obama getting in is a step towards ending discrimination, and then giving props to prop 8. How many of them have had threesomes ya think? Hello, that involves some GAY. If I were to grab my girl Sabrina and offer up some girl on girl on guy with some of these "mic masters", that would be against the WORD word? You think they'd walk away from it? I think I'd see some serious gold teeth shimmering in delight myself. Alas, if gay is wrong, no touchy-touchy.

Decisions are based on biblical references, the book from which they pick and choose what THEY can get down with, but Mo's aren't allowed that same courtesy. It's one thing to want that life for yourself, but it's fucked up to smugly impose on others what you can barely subscribe to. How come homosexuals have to do everything that the bible says but you don't Puffy? Do you think you are better than they are?

Can we at least make "civil unions" allow ALL the rights of marriage and not call it marriage? No mention of them in the bible.

"Separation of Church and State" protects both sides, but I'm so over it leaning off to the right.

ALL IN! If there are amendments based on religious beliefs, THAT is NOT separate, but hey, let's do it to the fucking hilt! The bible states that whoever you stick your dick in, you HAVE to marry them. No exceptions. It also allows for multiple wives ages 13 and up; are we going there too? (R. Kelly will.) Can't eat pork or shrimp (oh the Chinese unemployment rate just skyrocketed and no more quoting Chris Rock's "How much are them ribs?"), and you can't work on the Sabbath or you get stoned to death (pastors included). The bible does not say anything bad about pedophilia (I've read it twice all the way through)…need I go on?

Which part of Christianity are we gonna give the honor? Credit card taking Catholics (pay your way to heaven at just two bucks a candle) or the snake handling southern Baptists (all you can freak)? If I'm forced to hold a live, sober rattlesnake, then I change my mind. I will marry after all, but to someone from another English speaking country that isn't pretending to be democratic when it's not (these countries, damn they lie!).

If we aren't going to separate church and state, then it's time to pay taxes my praying little pretties (retroactive to the 50's when the government put the religious thumbprint on money and our pledge of allegiance). You know what happens then? You'll have to drive 60 miles to find a church, but an illegal abortion clinic will be in spitting distance (or, at the very least, on every Indian reservation next to the casinos).

I really don't give a yak's ass what our money says, and I don't care if you believe in magic underpants, or that you hear voices. I would defend your right to do so, but I am disgusted by those that can't live up to their own yapping ideals and expect others to or they're cancelled as "Americans". What's next then? Would they vote for agnostics (me) or atheists to not be able to marry? How about someone who had a sex change? Hermaphrodites? Who are they allowed to walk down the aisle with?

ALL IN! You can't pick and choose from your moral dictates, and not allow the same privilege to everyone. Not that I even half way like the "Founding Fathers" (I'm part indigenous - we weren't lost you dumb fucks), but they left England because they wanted to NOT have government dictate their religion (though it was perfectly fine for them to do so to the not-so-white inhabitants of the place they fled to - see what happens when you talk to strangers instead of scalping 'em?)

If we're going to change it so that our government is totally "under god", then maybe it's not "indivisible". Theocracy and democracy can't hold the same water. The former doesn't provide "liberty and justice for ALL" without conditions.

I call shotgun on the blue states for us shrimp-eating folks that stay out of other people's business (so long as they aren't breaking the law). Completely equal rights to everyone of legal and consenting age. The religious are also welcome, but your say is no more valued than anyone elses.

I don't think that all people who vote against gay rights are to be equated with skinheads or the folks donning 200 thread counts on their fucked up heads. I do, however, wonder if by saying gay is "wrong" in any capacity, gives fuel to their agendas. Saying it with government may possibly contribute to the death of someone that isn't hurting you. Not condoning or condemning it doesn't appear to kill anyone.

"What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you say." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Currently listening :
Narrow Stairs
By Death Cab for Cutie
Release date: 2008-05-13