Monday, July 14, 2008

Callously Call Us Callused 3/28/08

Usage Note: Do not confuse the adjective callous, as in Years of dealing with criminals had left her callous, with the noun callus, as in I have a callus on my thumb. Also, do not confuse the verb callous, which means "to make or become callous," with the verb callus "to form or develop hardened tissue." -

Last evening I had quite a few conversations with several different people. We discussed a variety of things, MUSIC (bien sur), heartache (I heard three tales of woe and told my own), synchronicity (man, I had a ton of coincidences happen later in the night, WEIRD), and RISK, which sort of factors into all of the above mentioned subjects.

RISK is defined as "exposure to the chance of injury or loss; a hazard or dangerous chance", which is pretty damn negative if you ask me. Aren’t you also exposing yourself to the possibility of personal gain, healing, and happiness as well? Is there a different word for that angle of RISK? My fogged up brain can’t think of one at the moment, so pardon me if one is available and I overlooked it.

There is an underlying defeatism that we’re taught from day one and it’s been sold to us under the guise of protection, but in the end it’s our worst enemy. It can be so limiting that we even feel the need to speak of RISK in hesitant terms, mainly to not look the fool or "jinx" things, if you will.

It’s strange how people often grip so hard to what they believe are statistical outcomes.

When you choose music as a career path, you are met with many a furrowed brow and no matter how talented you are, you will always be asked what "plan b" is by some buzz killer. If they don’t know anyone that makes a living that way, it’s just out of their scope of thinking. These people truly suck. They itch when they hear phrases like "reckless abandon" and they scowl from the inside out at the mere hint of passion over reason. They have lifetime subscriptions to complacency and are fixated on tea bagging oppression. Guarantees are absent in any profession, one car accident can affirm that.

There are no guarantees in love either. My one friend is clearly smitten with someone, but it’s a long distance thing and it seems like there is this careful propriety of how you even can speak about it, which I don’t get. So what if it’s risky? 95% of the people I know/knew that got involved in long distance relationships are married and happily so, and I really can’t fathom divorce ever factoring into their futures. 95% of the people I know/knew that got together under what is deemed "normal" circumstances are earnestly awaiting divorce papers or are vigorously anticipating the death of their significant other.

I didn’t bring my version of statistics to the table, but I told him to make a fist. Then I told him to open his hand. You can get scarred on either sides of your hands but the inside of an open hand is fleshier, more prepared for injury, and can even build up calluses for protection.

Anyone who plays a stringed instrument remembers the razor-like pain you experience when new strings first meet soft, virginal fingers. The ears’ demands must be met so the hands must persevere. Eventually, calluses form on your fingertips and there is a sweet numbness that is brokered between you and the strings as long as you remain committed to the pressing.

Calluses won’t form on the outside of your hand, though, so if you are more of the closed fist kind of person, you’re fucked(unless you wear boxing gloves the rest of your life). Fists are really only necessary in two instances: fighting and bizarre sexual acts that I can’t get my mind around. Try picking up something with your fist, it’s not very practical is it?

Open hands invite experience despite the consequences, and maybe those unclenched fingers can tickle RISK a little, whether it’s in dealings of the amorous or in doing what is meaningful to you.

"I Wanna Hold Your Hand" was the first song I ever heard, in my recollection. Nobody writes songs about holding fists.

Currently listening : ABBA - Gold: Greatest Hits By ABBA Release date: 21 September, 1993

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